Quotes

Bat Poles

"Really? You have to label the batpoles?" -Jen

"Well, you don’t want Robin sliding down Batman’s pole." - Cande

(discussing the 1966 television series)

— JenX

Slap!

Have you ever seen somebody DJ a dance party with a laptop? The skill it takes to press play on your playlist while you check MySpace for fake females as nobody dances is totally awesome.

— Useless Eater

Mr. Ed

Mickey must spend his time in Mr. Ed chatrooms -Violent Apathy Man

good morning kalamazoo

It smells like breath in here.

                            

— kapn’ jr.

haiku song of the naughty teen

We used to drag race

Dad’s Cutlass Supreme, backwards,

Down Bumblebee Lane.

— Carol Sn*pp

Aerial Photography

Monk said ‘There is no wrong note, it has to do with how you resolve it’. He almost sounded like a kid taking piano lessons. I could relate to that when I first started playing the piano, because he was decomposing the music while he was playing it.

— Tom Waits

truth in badvertising

"It doesn’t need to be true, it just needs to be on TV."

— Dusty Sexton
The Evening Commentary

Sartorial Simian

"Illinois has been good to Tim’s hair."

— Holden F.

First Level Dandy

I’m not a homosexual, but that Magnus guy is pretty hot.

— Mr. Herb Tarlick

Advantage: Inkster

Our kids have a huge advantage already. We’re not in and out of mental hospitals.

— Nathan
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